• Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead

  • A Novel
  • By: Emily Austin
  • Narrated by: Emily Tremaine
  • Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
  • 3.9 out of 5 stars (219 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

In this “fun, page-turner of a novel” (Sarah Haywood, New York Times best-selling author) that’s perfect for fans of Mostly Dead Things and Goodbye, Vitamin, a morbidly anxious young woman stumbles into a job as a receptionist at a Catholic church and soon finds herself obsessed with her predecessor’s mysterious death.

Gilda, a 20-something, atheist, animal-loving lesbian, cannot stop ruminating about death. Desperate for relief from her panicky mind and alienated from her repressive family, she responds to a flyer for free therapy at a local Catholic church, and finds herself being greeted by Father Jeff, who assumes she’s there for a job interview. Too embarrassed to correct him, Gilda is abruptly hired to replace the recently deceased receptionist Grace.

In between trying to memorize the lines to Catholic mass, hiding the fact that she has a new girlfriend, and erecting a dirty dish tower in her crumbling apartment, Gilda strikes up an email correspondence with Grace’s old friend. She can’t bear to ignore the kindly old woman who has been trying to reach her friend through the church inbox, but she also can’t bring herself to break the bad news. Desperate, she begins impersonating Grace via email. But when the police discover suspicious circumstances surrounding Grace’s death, Gilda may have to finally reveal the truth of her mortifying existence.

With a “kindhearted heroine we all need right now” (Courtney Maum, New York Times best-selling author), Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead is a crackling and “delightfully weird reminder that we will one day turn to dust and that yes, this is depressing, but it’s also what makes life beautiful” (Jean Kyoung Frazier, author of Pizza Girl).

©2021 Emily Austin. All rights reserved (P)2021 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: LGBTQ+

Critic Reviews

"Tremaine's pacing and delivery capture Gilda's mounting anxiety as she spirals out of control, becoming increasingly preoccupied with death and disaster as her life crumbles around her. Tremaine's characterizations bring heart to Gilda's well-meaning co-workers, complex family members, and unique friendships." (AudioFile Magazine)

What listeners say about Everyone in This Room Will Someday Be Dead

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
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    5 out of 5 stars

Gilda & Eleanor Would be Friends

If you liked “Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine”, this should be your next listen. It is a raw, laugh-out-loud story about mental health and feeling like nothing matters while also feeling like everything matters. Cannot recommend enough.

3 people found this helpful

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Unexpectedly Entertaining

I don't remember how I discovered this book. The premise intrigued me. This book is both funny and poignant. I did laugh out loud several times. I admired Gilda's ingenuity in hiding her secrets while feeling sorry that she felt she had to. I hope she has a better life going forward, and I think she will.

2 people found this helpful

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Gilda says the things we all are thinking

This book touches on it all. The extraordinary of the ordinary such as hearing a loved one laugh. Family denial and pretending not to see what is right in front of them. Gilda deals with depression in such a honest and funny way that was delivered perfectly by the narrator. Gilda is a cool character to take a journey with .

2 people found this helpful

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Starts out promising...

This starts off promising and unique and goes downhill with it's circular issues that never get addressed. After a while you just want the main character to get it together and she has no interest in that. Could have been better had the characters been more fleshed out.

1 person found this helpful

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  • KM
  • 05-25-22

Boo hoo Protagonist

Sorry, this is the first bad review for me to have to write. This main character is too whiny for enjoyment.

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The story just went nowhere

I wanted to like this book. But the story just went nowhere. Nothing happened. It just drug on and on and on and quite frankly toward the end was kind of a bear to get through.

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A gigantic disappointment

The narrator was great. The story? This book was recommended as being hilarious. I kept waiting for it to happen. This was a big waste of time. I should have pulled the plug on it 1/4 of the way through.

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Awful narration

I really tried to listen to this because the story seemed promising, but the narration was terrible! Lots of awkward pauses, stilted and flat emotion… I got halfway through and just couldn’t stand it anymore.

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Liked it

Overall, I enjoyed listening to this story as it really let's you live in the mind of someone who struggles with anxiety and other mental challenges. Since I myself am not struggling with this, I found it very eye-opening and valuable, as you understand the thinking behind the behaviors of the main character. At some point it got a bit too much and repetitive in my opinion. The book also has many very funny moments. The reader's performance is very good.

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Incredibly anticlimactic

I personally would recommend this book to those with high anxiety or stress disorders in order to let them know that the “normal” is not always normal for everyone.

It offers a glimpse into the mind of those that tend to have high anxiety or overthink often.

On the other hand, this book completely missed its mark for me. I waited for a while for it to come to a climax and when it finally did, it was plateaued. The story like seems to be repetitive with the same thoughts over and over again.

The ending was very abrupt and disappointing.