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Fingers Crossed  By  cover art

Fingers Crossed

By: Miki Berenyi
Narrated by: Miki Berenyi,Mark Gardener
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Publisher's Summary

Includes an original song written by Miki exclusively for the audio edition and an exclusive Q&A with 'Ride' singer & guitarist Mark Gardener.

Formed in 1988, Lush were part of the London gig scene during one of the most vibrant and creative periods in UK music. Now, Miki Berenyi tells all.

The audiobook begins with her childhood of extremes. From the bohemian lifestyle of her father's social circle to the privileged glamour of her mother's acting career, Miki's young life was a blur of travel, celebrities and private schooling. But frequent relocation, parental neglect and the dark presence of her abusive grandmother resulted in crippling shyness, mental-health issues and a vulnerability to exploitation. The route out of this hole was music—a passion shared by schoolmate Emma Anderson. The teenagers began attending gigs together and would eventually go on to form Lush.

Peppered with anecdotes involving a cast of hundreds (including Blur, Sean Connery, Tracey Emin, Pearl Jam and the Red Hot Chili Peppers), this uncompromising autobiography documents Lush's thrilling rise, dispiriting fall and subsequent bounceback, reliving the tours, recording sessions and problematic managers they experienced along the way. But at the heart of the book are Miki's own battles: the conflict between her mouthy public persona and her thin-skinned private identity; the trials of being a woman in an infuriatingly male world; the struggle to find a middle ground between safe indie obscurity and sellout international success. The memoir also explores Miki's complex relationship with Emma—one that has fluctuated between camaraderie and rivalry over the years—and addresses the most devastating tragedy of all: the suicide of her soulmate, Lush drummer Chris Acland.

Told through frank confession, wry humour and emotional honesty, this is the incredible tale of a trailblazing woman and a seminal band.

©2022 Miki Berenyi (P)2022 Bonnier Books UK

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  • Richard
  • 10-12-22

Loved it

Just loved it - unapologetic, reflective, gentle but raw, compelling. I’ve never heard of Lush but I was drawn to this book by the dramatic headlines, I stayed for the lot and loved it all

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  • MR M.
  • 10-07-22

Brilliant

One of the best biographies I have read. Brilliantly written and read. Grips you from the start and the 12 hour listen went by in a flash. Would love a sequal. Congratulations Miki and thank you for sharing this wonderful book with us.

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  • Neil larrisey
  • 10-04-22

Unflinching and Honest

Brilliant book by one of my favourite musicians. Miki doesn't shy away from telling the truth of her life, even when she is at fault.
Love it.

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  • C Knowles
  • 10-03-22

Accurate Account Of The 90s British Music Scene

Thanks for this Miki - you articulate alot of what women involved in the Indie Scene encountered in the early 90s - I too hated the sudden shift to Ladette Culture which was unsettling and, in fact, threatening to women especially at gigs.

Like all creative partnerships, there was the inevitable tension between Miki and Emma - thanks for your honesty Miki and I would love for Emma to chronicle her account of those days.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 12-02-22

Great insight into what the music industry is like

A great book written and read by Miki, very engaging as an audio book too. Miki's story provides an insight into the music scene in the UK from the late 80's to mid 90's and all of its ups and many downs. The book deals with a lot of the issues that come with being a band and not only that but when it was rare to see a woman in a band at that time and the struggles of that in a back then very male dominated and toxic environment. Miki's autobiography is great for fans of her music and those who want to hear a very dark at times and compelling story of a musicians life.

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  • Claire S
  • 11-19-22

A fascinating story, beautifully narrated.

I loved every second of this book. Miki narrated it brilliantly. Traumatic in places but ultimately inspiring - her life story is an incredible listen. Wish you well Miki x

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  • W Armstrong
  • 10-30-22

Brutally honest and fascinating

A very honest record of an interesting life, funny, sad, brutal. well worth a read

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  • Mike Knight
  • 10-24-22

What a life.

Miki give a real voice to the word challenge. A brilliant listen, keeps you drawn in.

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  • Kindle Rafe
  • 10-22-22

A fascinating and sometimes harrowing read

I really loved it. Brutally honest in parts and funny in others. Well recommended for any music fans

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  • Brian
  • 10-16-22

Who remembers Shoegaze?

Enjoyed this - not many writers read their books well but Berenyi has an enjoyable voice and delivery. Unusual for music memoirs, the section on her childhood is the most interesting - colourful, sad and at times very unpleasant. After that we have a fairly familiar tale of the music biz being lousy but if, like me, you’d never expected to hear of the likes of Salad, Moose, Fabulous or Menswear again or had forgotten just how lame the early 90s indie scene was then this is a good nostalgia trip.