• If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late

  • A Divorce Lawyer's Guide to Staying Together
  • By: James J. Sexton
  • Narrated by: James J. Sexton
  • Length: 8 hrs and 17 mins
  • 4.8 out of 5 stars (1,171 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

In this pertinent audiobook, hard-hitting divorce lawyer James Sexton shares his insights and wisdom from the frontlines of divorce to keep you out of his office and improve on your relationship

If You're In My Office, It's Already Too Late. James Sexton knows this. After dealing with over 1000 clients whose marriages have dissolved over everything from an ill-advised threesome with the nanny to the uneven division of carpool duties, he also knows all of the what-not-to-dos for couples who want to build - and consistently work to preserve - a lasting, fulfilling relationship.

Described by former clients as a "courtroom gunslinger" and "the sociopath you want on your side", Sexton tells the unvarnished truth about relationships, diving straight into the most common marital problems. These usually derive from dishonest - or nonexistent - communication. Even when the alleged reason for separation is one spouse's new "personal trainer", there's usually a communication problem that predates the fitness kick. Symptom and root cause get confused all the time.

Sexton has spent his career working with spouses-to-be-no-longer. Reverse-engineering a relationship can help to identify and fix what does not work. Ever feel like you're holding back criticism of your spouse because you just can't have that fight right now? Sexton will tell you to "Hit Send Now". Maybe you aren't as adventurous as you used to be, or need some you-time, but for some reason, it seems weird or exhausting to change up the routine now.

Sexton knows where that mentality leads and offers viable alternative paths to take. Though he deals constantly with the heartbreak of others, he still believes in romance and the transformative power of love. This audiobook is his opportunity to use what he has learned to help couples that aren't so far gone get back on track.

©2018 James J. Sexton (P)2018 Macmillan Audio

Critic Reviews

"Sexton's narration debut is impressive. He reads smoothly, with animated conviction and passion for his subject that shine through." (AudioFile Magazine)

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What listeners say about If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late

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Mind blowing

This book blew my mind. I’ve been married for 18 years and learned more about marriage from this book then my own experience has.

23 people found this helpful

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Funny, refreshing & forthright

I laughed out, nodded in agreement and nearly cried while listening. If you believe that the decline or demise is your partner’ fault this book gives you the sign & signposts you would best be heeding to begin to reconnect and recover from the less than stellar current state of your relationship.

Have just started listening to this book for the second time.

22 people found this helpful

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Great Book!

I truly enjoyed this book. A lot of lessons about how to be a better spouse so you don't end up needing a lawyer, or how to be a decent person if divorce is inevitable. I've been married almost 17 years, and I'll be the first to admit that marriage is hard. I'm always looking for ways to make it less challenging as well as remembering to appreciate the good things that can easily be taken for granted. This book helped me with both. In fact, I want my spouse to listen to it next. Mr. Sexton is an awesome narrator and story teller, and by the time you are done listening to this book, I'm pretty sure most will think twice about going through a divorce without really giving their marriage their best shot. I also don't want to forget to mention how hard I laughed at many of Mr. Sexton' s stories. Highly recommended this book.

7 people found this helpful

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James Sexton is a Brilliant story teller

Where does If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

I rate this in my top 5 Audible books in my library

What about James J. Sexton’s performance did you like?

He is a amazing story teller , full of humor and great marriage advise . i will reread this book many times through out my life . i give it a 10 out of 10

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

I experienced a full spectrum of emotions through out this book . it was a entertaining and enlightening and educational journey full of wit and humor.

7 people found this helpful

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Everyone should read this!

I am not married, nor have I ever been, but this book is a must read even if you have never been in a position to need a divorce attorney. James Sexton shares wisdom about relationships that is candid and spot on. The kind of stuff that if you have ever been in a relationship can be applied to any couple. Hindsight is 20/20 and this book gives you that look into what your life could be life, hopefully in time to fix the problems before they start. He uses wit, anecdotes from his years of experience on the other side of the table (the "too late" he is talking about) to really get to the heart of why people have relationship issues and what they should do instead. Like I said, I have not been in a situation to need a divorce attorney, but this book was so compelling and entertaining I actually just read it because it was interesting. The author himself reads it and he has the right personality to really make you want to keep listening. (Not entirely joking, but he was likable enough that he is now one of my new "celebrity crushes" because his ideas were so refreshingly candid! He sounds like he would be fascinating to talk to in real life!) It was one of those books where you keep nodding your head like, "Oh yeah he is totally right. That is so true!" It is common sense but not the kind of thing you would think about until after you have a problem. Totally recommended reading for anyone who is in a relationship, wants to be or is just fascinated by human interpersonal dynamics.

5 people found this helpful

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Solid advice on a tough topic ,very funny!

Who knew  divorce could be so fascinating.  I never thought I would be so absorbed by a book with this subject matter. Jim is overall a great story teller and laugh out loud funny. A much needed look into relationships in the time of Facebook and social media.

5 people found this helpful

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funny and good advice

This book was excellent funny good advice and straightforward I would recommend it to anybody

4 people found this helpful

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Good info but…

This book contained useful and thought provoking information. It definitely makes one think twice about divorcing. I thought it was well written and well presented. However, as smart as he sounds, I believe the author could have been more creative in the words he chose to describe and relate his points without the use of so much profanity.

2 people found this helpful

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Very enjoyable, laugh-out loud

Very enjoyable content and great narration from the author. Highly recommended. What you would call a page turner if it was a physical book. Unfortunately, there's a few very American stereotypes present, but that is of course to be expected as the author practices law in New York. Just don't take it too seriously to apply to the rest of the world. There's also, as the author himself notes, some contradiction in the advice itself and a bit of unfair generalisation. I'm also left with the impression that, while open minded and non-judgemental, James sexton is a bit of a traditionalist at heart. Many people will, for example, argue that there are many flavours to love, that those flavours evolve over time in a couple. What keeps people in a marriage can differ quite a bit from one couple to the next and might not always be as tied to the issues that his clients most frequently bring up in divorce procedures. Nevertheless, great listen and highly recommended 👌 👍 👏

2 people found this helpful

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Great book

on the brink o gdx divorce myself, fighting to avoid it. this book helps bring reality into perspective

2 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 04-19-22

Needed!!

the book is simply needed 😍 I'm currently thinking about becoming a wife and it's one of those book that you have to read if you're serious about it.
loved it and had a laugh many times. perfect combo.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 04-28-21

Interesting perspective ...starting from the end

Everything he said is about real stories and very applicable to everyday situations. Despite being a “how no to” there are many ideas on how to get it right.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 12-12-19

Very enjoyable

Overall I liked this book a lot... It was well thought out and structured in a clever manner... the author clearly has a lot of experience with the subject matter and had some great advice to give out based on that experience as well as his own personal experience... I liked his candid manner as well... if I was married and looking to get divorced I think I would pick this guy as my lawyer as I like his manner and approach and I think that I would end up liking him... having said all of that there are times when his ego becomes quite apparent and I found that a little off-putting... despite his references to Buddhism he displays a little bit of arrogance from time to time... at the end of the day he is a lawyer... and a divorce lawyer at that... hence he's going to be full of contradictions and not the most trustworthy person out there... still all in all I highly recommend this book as it's both informative and entertaining...

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  • Len-R8R
  • 12-20-18

A suitable listen for single people as well!

A suitable listen for single people as well as married couples. Will listen to this again and take notes. A great relationship primer.

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  • Reluctant Mermaid
  • 05-29-18

FANTASTIC

Forget therapy - listen to this book!
Great advice for ANY couple from a man who’s heard it all.