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Publisher's Summary

Learn how to successfully negotiate conflicts and deepen our most intimate relationships in this practical and thoughtful guide by an experienced Buddhist teacher, psychotherapist, and couples counselor.

A committed relationship, as most people see it today, is a partnership of equals who share values and goals, a team united by love and dedicated to each other’s growth on every level. This contemporary model for coupledom requires real intention and work, and, more often than not, the traditional archetypes of relationships experienced by our parents and grandparents fail us or seem irrelevant. 

Utilizing the wisdom of her years of personal and professional practice, Young-Eisendrath dismantles our idealized projections about love, while revealing how mindfulness and communication can help us identify and honor the differences with our partners and strengthen our bonds. 

These practical and time-tested guidelines are rooted in sound understanding of modern psychology and offer concrete ideas and the necessary tools to reinforce and reinvigorate our deepest relationships.

©2004 Polly Young-Eisendrath (P)2019 Shambhala Publications

Critic Reviews

Intimate relationships are the householder’s monastery: a place to learn about oneness and connectivity with a special other. In the most successful relationships, that oneness and connectivity extends out to encompass all of creation. But for a relationship to be successful at that level, one must be willing to be affirmed and negated, expanded and contracted, allowed and limited over and over again. Young-Eisendrath is both a seasoned psychotherapist and a veteran contemplative adept. As such, she is ideally qualified to provide the information and inspiration you’ll need in order to achieve that noble goal. (Shinzen Young, author of The Science of Enlightenment)

With razor-sharp clarity, depth, and compassion, Young-Eisendrath takes the reader on an illuminating journey into romantic love. Weaving together the insights of depth psychology, psychoanalysis, and Buddhist spirituality, she outlines a truly clarifying reflection on the nuts and bolts of sustainable partnership. Read this alone or with your partner. It is a gift to anyone who wants to live into the experience of mature love. (Pilar Jennings, PhD, author of To Heal a Wounded Heart)

What listeners say about Love Between Equals

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  • Overall
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Wow.

This book pretty well Covers it all for a lifetime partnership. I highly recommend it!

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astonishing

this is the most extraordinary book I have come across in 50 years on earth.

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Post gen x love and partnership

Amazing book, very on target with the modern love and the make up of couples in times where women try to find their balance at home and work while struggling to still be moms and wives. Power struggles and trust topics are strong. Very interesting. Likely have to listen to it again. Lots of loaded content to digest.

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Love Between Equals

The book is full of interesting insights and ideals, but very dense and abstract. Not many real life examples or practices included. It might be useful for psychotherapists or coaches or as an additional resourse for someone who is on a journey of personal growth but on its own, I don’t think it would allow a person struggling in their relationship to overcome the difficulties.

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Talks about what she’ll speak about more than she speaks it...

Found it very odd how much of the book felt like her saying ‘this book is about...this book can be used for...’ more than it actually provides helpful advice. The end of every chapter promotes the book, it feels like an endless intro/foreword.