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Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Third Edition  By  cover art

Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Third Edition

By: Carol Tavris,Elliot Aronson
Narrated by: Carol Tavris,Elliot Aronson
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Publisher's Summary

Why do people dodge responsibility when things fall apart? Why the parade of public figures unable to own up when they screw up? Why the endless marital quarrels over who is right? Why can we see hypocrisy in others but not in ourselves? Are we all liars? Or do we really believe the stories we tell? 

Renowned social psychologists Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson take a compelling look into how the brain is wired for self-justification. When we make mistakes, we must calm the cognitive dissonance that jars our feelings of self-worth. And so we create fictions that absolve us of responsibility, restoring our belief that we are smart, moral, and right - a belief that often keeps us on a course that is dumb, immoral, and wrong. 

Backed by years of research and delivered in lively, energetic prose, Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) offers a fascinating explanation of self-deception - how it works, the harm it can cause, and how we can overcome it.

©2020 Carol Tavris (P)2020 Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

What listeners say about Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Third Edition

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    2 out of 5 stars
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If you're a liberal hater - this book's for you

Carol leads you along - apologizing in the beginning to disguise her own prejudices, and waits until the last chapter to unload on Trump and conservatives. No a word about Uncle Joe and all the anti American blundering socialist blabber he espouses. Enjoy .

4 people found this helpful

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A quake book for me

I just reread this book, having first read it about 10 or 11 yrs ago. (ok, this time I listened to the audiobook) Mistakes Were Made has influenced me more than almost any book I've ever read, and I've read a whole lot. I consider it to be a "quake" book for me, and it's no exaggeration to say that it had made me a better person.

That said, I must say I was pained by many lines in the final, political chapter. Lots of decent points are raised in that chapter, but I have a lot of problems with it. I will leave it at that though, because I don't want my problems with that chapter to cause anyone to not read the rest of this book. But when you do get to the final chapter, don't feel bad if you turn it off after getting the main points!

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Just Google cognitive dissonance and watch videos

this book is the perfect example of redundancy. all that is spoken about is cognitive dissonance and positive bias. The book is just a series of examples with no actual Solutions or constructive feedback for dealing with somebody who exhibits cognitive dissonance. Or how to repair the habit of cognitive dissonance.

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Garbage

Author has her own opinions and comes up with imaginary reasons to justify her position. Self justification much?

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1/4 info 3/4 diatribe on Trump

Was interesting but then just turned into an attack on Trump with nothing new or interesting. Big comparison to Trump and Mussolini surreal

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Political

Don’t be fooled. The author has an agenda. I couldn’t get past the preface. I thought we would hear science, but it was most definitely starting out with clear opinion. That’s not what I was looking for.

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Falls victim to it's own message.

I'm not even a Trump supporter and this book definitely fell victim to it's own message at the end. And for some reason just saying that seems to keep my review from being published...

Beyond that, it's a great book. I would have given it four stars if not for the complete collapse at the end.

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Excellent and very timely

Very important and well researched book. Teaches you about the inaccuracies of memory and the power of dissonance to make us rationalize our mistakes.

I highly recommend this book!

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A must read/listen to!

Because we all make mistakes. Because our soul eats at us, long after we have made them. Because we can become better if we have the strength to admit that we are flawed.
Facing the truth takes courage and this book is a helping hand.

1 person found this helpful

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Listen and learn how to change your mind.

With a 2019 added final chapter about President Trump -- best listened to after absorbing the lessons of the previous chapters.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Laoise Rowe
  • 02-21-22

Super interesting

This book made me realise a lot about my own behaviours and other peoples! Would recommend

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  • Peter Lawless
  • 09-28-20

incredible insights into justifying our actions

Absolutely brilliant, it shows us ourselves in the burnished mirror of self justification, stemming from our attempts to reduce dissonance. Even more stark is the warning to America's voters on their choices facing them.. democracy or dictatorship!