• Off with My Head

  • The Definitive Basic B*tch Handbook to Surviving Rock Bottom
  • By: Stassi Schroeder
  • Narrated by: Stassi Schroeder
  • Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (966 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

The New York Times best-selling author of Next Level Basic and fan-favorite alumna of Bravo’s Vanderpump Rules returns with the definitive Basic Bitch handbook for surviving your rock-bottom moments.

The year 2020 was going to be the best year of Stassi’s life. Besides getting engaged and feeling like she was on top of the world career-wise, she bought her first house and was planning her dream Italian wedding. The future showed so much freaking promise—until it all went to hell. Stassi may not be perfect—she may have made some (major) mistakes—but she does feel like she has some insight (and plenty of hilarious tales) about getting knocked up, called out, and learning from what went wrong.

Through stories, confessions, and plenty of self-reflection and self-deprecation, this new book goes behind the scenes and addresses the experience of getting cancelled, getting that positive pregnancy test, and saying “I do” in the backyard instead of in Italy. Stassi won’t hold back about her transformation from proud basic bitch to... proud basic bitch who has a deeper appreciation for what’s really important in life: love, relationships, mutual respect, and, okay fine, an Aperol spritz and some showtunes when you need them most.

Stassi hopes her story will help others see the light at the end of the tunnel in their own lives and make them laugh along the way. She writes about the importance of having a good cry (at work, in the shower, in your closet), ways to navigate social media responsibly (sometimes that means logging the eff off when crowds are chanting, “OFF WITH HER HEAD”), how to practice self-care when wine is not an option, and how not to become a Bridezilla—plus she’ll offer tips on marrying your f*ckboy, embracing pregnancy sweats (both cashmere sweats and night sweats), and styling baby OOTDs.

So roll up your bedazzled sleeves…or the sleeves of the tattered robe you’ve been wearing nonstop because you’re at rock bottom; grab a cocktail; and let your favorite (more evolved) basic bitch take you on a wild ride inside the bumpiest year of her life.  

©2022 Nastassia Schroeder. All rights reserved. (P)2022 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved.

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What listeners say about Off with My Head

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Extremely boring book of excuses for bad behavior

I actually like Stassi and her style, despite her history of bitchiness and a bad attitude, but this book is so boring. Anything she talks about is paired with a list of excuses as to why she would participate in a particular event, down to her baby shower. I appreciated the apology and reasoning behind her apology in the beginning of the book, but nine chapters in - I’m over it. Seriously just tell me about some Vanderpump friend drama and your great style and call it a day. The entire book is a PR stunt.

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Abhorrent

I wanted to hear Stassi’s side. What I didn’t expect is to see or hear her pandering to wokeness. Everything she did from the moment she got canceled, totally fed in to the racial Wilness that is now America. unfortunately but she did not do with educate herself. Because what happened with Faith, was not about race until Faith, Son opening and made it about one. This book is more political correct a bullshit that America doesn’t need. People need to wake up and not be woke and there is a difference between that and racism and the sooner America realizes it the better.

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Very Very Very Repetitive!!!!

This was a decent book in the beginning and slowly became a book about how conceited the author is...a pain in the royal butt...I feel sorry for her husband if this is an actual account of her life!!! Save your money...period!

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Meh...

Well i wanted to really love this book. i grew tired of the lingo like "totes" and "AF. thats one credit i can never get back.

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Not worth the purchase

I was deeply looking forward to this book and was deeply disappointed. I am still unsure if this was a book to tell us a few times how sorry you were about your mistakes?

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OFF WITH HER HEAD!

Stassi’s 2nd book was everything I hoped to hear out of her since 2020 really burned everything down! She was raw and real and answered many questions that I think the public was asking of her, and came out the other side. Her writing style is very specific and it’s even better to hear the audiobook version in her voice. Loved hearing all about her house and baby Hartford, too!

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She's baack!

Have been a fan since the beginning , never truly cancelled her but honestly thought she could use some perspective as she got progressively harder to defend. This book and her reading it to you is just the Stassi we never knew we needed. She's still snarky and witty but now she is thinking before she speaks and she is clearly putting a lot more effort into growing and learning. I appreciated the honesty and her ability to be self deprecating and vulnerable to the reader. I look forward to more in the future from the new and improved Stassi.

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Forever a 5 Star, BUTTT....

I absolutely love that stassi is writing books. I love seeing her growth from VPR to now, in her books. However, I do think those trendy terms like: AF,Probs, Totes were a bit excessive and for me really toned down the importance of showcasing her survival skills and growth in through her rock bottom and setting the tone for her comeback.

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I wanted to like it.

I love Stassi, but writing a book is not her forum. Listening to her read it was painful sometimes. She mentions the same things over and over and over and it gets redundant. I so wanted to like this book, but unfortunately it wasn't very good.

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Loved It

An easy, heartfelt and entertaining read. A must read for anyone who watched Vanderpump Rules from the beginning, or maybe even not.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 08-31-22

Waste of money!

Shocking…I can’t believe I wasted my money and time! Got to chapter 3 and that was enough!

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  • Kirsten
  • 05-15-22

Loved it!

If you loved Stassi on VPR you will love book #2!
Good to hear about cancel culture from someone who has experienced it first hand. Funny and honest throughout

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  • Anonymous User
  • 05-06-22

Honest

Stassi is honest about her mistakes and privilege, shared funny moments and heartfelt times. Worth it

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  • Eleanor Rowledge
  • 05-05-22

Great comeback

Loved this, very thoughtful and reflective, feels like Stassi is sat talking with you over a glass of wine.

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  • victoria whelan
  • 05-02-22

Great read

Loved the honesty as always . Really enjoyed this book . Looking forward to the next one

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Vanessa Jenkins
  • 04-28-22

Great listen for when you feel rubbish

I have been feeling rubbish and this book was a fun reality check that puts things into perspective in a funny way.
It turned my frown upside down.
Highly recommend to bravo fans and sad people.

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  • Rebecca Zrinyi
  • 05-02-22

Perfectly read and written by the author herself.

I loved every minute of it. Stassi was honest and open and told the whole story. I didn't get her first book but I will now after listening to this one.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 04-27-22

It is what it is and so be it! Reality Star canceled 101

Stassi definitely hit rock bottom from a POV of a successful reality star who was popular and likeable. Faith deserved what she got to a certain extent and she defs used BLM to CANCEL Stassi and Kristen. However, based on Stassi’s history of events this was a good knock to the head for some reflection. All the best whenever her future may lie.