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Publisher's Summary

What if it's not your fault that sex is bad in your marriage?

Based on a groundbreaking in-depth survey of 22,000 Christian women, The Great Sex Rescue unlocks the secrets to what makes some marriages red hot while others fizzle out. Generations of women have grown up with messages about sex that make them feel dirty, used, or invisible, while men have been sold such a cheapened version of sex, they don't know what they're missing. The Great Sex Rescue hopes to turn all of that around, developing a truly biblical view of sex where mutuality, intimacy, and passion reign.

The Great Sex Rescue pulls back the curtain on what is happening in Christian bedrooms and exposes the problematic teachings that wreck sex for so many couples-and the good teachings that leave others breathless. In the #MeToo and #ChurchToo era, not only is this book a long overdue corrective to church culture, it is poised to free thousands of couples from repressive and dissatisfying sex lives so that they can experience the kind of intimacy and wholeness God intended.

Contains mature themes.

©2021 Sheila Wray Gregoire, Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach, Joanna Sawatsky (P)2021 eChristian

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What listeners say about The Great Sex Rescue

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Controversial message from questionable material

First, this book is written almost exclusively to women, not men, and it is a SEX book, not a MARRIAGE book. It's worth making that distinction.
Second, it gets its source material from a survey of 20,000 women, but no men. Take this into consideration when evaluating the authors' claims.
Third, the authors start from a basis of science, statistical analysis, and opinion, rather than starting from the idea that the Bible should be there source of answers. Do all the research you want (really, research is a good thing!), but if your "research" or opinions contradict the Bible, then they are faulty. The authors even go so far as to quote 1 Corinthians 7:3-5, only to turn around and echo the snake from the garden by saying, "is that really what it says?"
Fourth, the authors use a "rubric" to rate other popular marriage books, both Christian and secular. Oddly enough, two secular books get the highest scores of all, while they give "Love and Respect" a score of exactly 0. That book helped my marriage greatly and white it may not have exact same effect on every other marriage, I can't see how no one could not find even one redeemable quality in it.

Gregoire has a fixation on vaginismus and bad examples of Christian husbands throughout the book. Yes, these are real issues and they need to be addressed and not dismissed or underrated. That said, they should not be portrayed as the only cause of sexual issues in a marriage.

Two things the authors greatly missed the mark on: 1) The Bible should be the starting and ending point for marital, spiritual, and relational issues. By all means, include additional research, scholarship, testimony, and opinion, but do not put them above the reliability of Scripture.
2) What's best for a married couple should be determined by the couple. Stop reading Christian books on sex until you've first talked to your spouse about it. If the husband cannot listen to and articulate himself to his wife and vise versa, NO book can fix your marriage or your sex life. Gregoire's book does far too little to emphasize either of these primary truths.

For all their warnings against bad and damaging teaching in "Christian" sex books today, Gregoire et al. make the very mistakes they reprimand other authors for, all without using Scripture as a basis or getting any masculine input from their survey groups.

11 people found this helpful

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I’m begging you to read this ...

All of you. Women AND men.
As a one time embracer of the EMB culture and beliefs, one who helped others whittle away at her soul in an effort to keep my repeatedly unfaithful husband satisfied while he and I both thoroughly disregarded my needs and feelings ... this book is healing me like nothing else has in the 10 years since my divorce. I’ve read everything. Everything. Looking for answers, relief, direction, correction, understanding what’s “wrong with me,” looking for Jesus in a great chasm of hurt and brokenness. Here. Here it is. The John Gottman book the authors mention was the first book that spoke to my understanding of Jesus in marriage, though I was struggling to reconcile that it was a secular book. It broadened my perspective ... it was okay to question what other Christian’s believed (an insidious root in the evangelical world - questioning is NOT okay) and preached. Not all Christians get it right and not all secular folks have it wrong. Rookie mistake. God’s image and creation is in everyone. And everyone is capable of reflecting and distorting it. Thank you thank you thank you to the authors (and to those who filled out the surveys) for shining Light (Jesus) on a long-standing destructive system of belief. Your boldness and bravery are a gift beyond measure to so many women. May your message be spread quickly to restore what the locusts have taken. This book has moved to the top of my giveaway list, and yes, I will beg others to read it just as I am begging you the reader of this review. This ... this is Love.

9 people found this helpful

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The most refreshing book!

Wow, wow, wow!!! EVERYONE needs to read this book! So incredibly eye opening to the horrible things taught by so called Christians about Gods design for marriage and sex. I cried so hard reading the stories of the women, men, and marriages hurt by these completely unbiblical teachings. Thank you so much for confronting these gross misrepresentations and replacing them with Gods good truth and design. I have so much hope for what God wants to do in our marriage and how to better raise and train our sons and daughters. I can’t say thank you enough for your boldness to write this!

7 people found this helpful

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A must read for any Christian - married or not

I now know what advice I'm going to give when people ask for "advice for the new couple" - read this book together! Well written and engaging. I haven't read most of the books they discussed (thank goodness) but have still been exposed to most of the same themes and ideas in them. The example passages they call out from books are often shocking and even literally nauseating. Even with being in a great marriage with wonderful intimacy, the book made me look at and let go of emotional baggage I wasn't even fully aware I had. I also feel like I have a better understanding of the pain and struggles other women are possibly dealing with. I fully respect the amount of work and dedication the authors took to survey 20,000 women in order to draw their insights. Whether you are sexually active or not, married or not, a man or a woman, you should read this book if you are looking for a better relationship with the opposite sex and before offering relationship or sex advice to others.

6 people found this helpful

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Actually worth the read

This book is surprising well written. It actually takes the Bible’s perspective of sex with out manipulating it. I also really appreciate the statistics they used to back up their claims

5 people found this helpful

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A Must Read!

I have been searching and searching trying to figure out what God wants for our marriage. I’ve read many Christian books and listened to many Christian sermons only to hear the same message; which hasn’t brought forth light, but at times even made our sex and marriage worse. My husband and I listened to this book together. We both thank the authors of this book, and would recommend it to every pastor, every married couple, and every engaged couple. It is time to start preaching on this subject aligned with Biblical truths; not human opinions or expectations. Thank you for all of the research and time put into this book.

3 people found this helpful

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Every husband should read this book.

I'm a husband of 5 years. Its time that Christian men man up and quit blaming things on their wives. This book is one the best on the subject.

3 people found this helpful

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Every couple needs to read this

Wow. This book was truly incredible! My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years, together for 10. This book was recommended to me, and it’s exactly what our marriage needed! Very thorough and thought out. Super engaging content and voice. It stirred up a lot of deep conversations that addressed many lies and beliefs from our past that we hadn’t ever realized we had. Everyone should listen to this, even if you don’t think you need “rescuing.” We listened to it together, and my husband is now recommending it to every person who will listen. Just buy it. You won’t regret it!

3 people found this helpful

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Amazing!

Not the easiest book to read , simply because of all the paradigm shifts that took place in my mind , but just what our marriage needed after 20+ yrs. I'm sharing it with many friends and family! Narrator was great !

3 people found this helpful

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For abusive relationship

If you have a good marriage and are looking for the next level then this isn't it. If you are not in an abusive relationship then this isn't for you, The author is someone I have been familiar with for several years and over time has become a very jaded writer about men and sex. She criticizes book after book in her writing and yet seems to preach the same message in reverse. Both are wrong. To sum up the book if you are abused get out. Say no to abuse. Have pain see a Doctor. which are good messages but then she transfers to your man is responsible for all your needs and you are responsible for none of his. This book wasn't freeing, wasn't helpful to any health, good Christian man. It was harmful to men and will cause them to be too scared to lead, love, show affection, or think that marriage is even worth the effort. Feminists will love every word(some of it very good for abused women). The author didn't used to be so jaded but after hearing years of horror stories she sure comes across like a man hater. I really had high hopes for this book I was looking for something to increase our intimacy, make life more fun and fulfilling, find new ways to bring love to my wife. If you are in a abusive relationship then this is a good book but it should maybe be titled different because after reading this book I would rather be single. If your a man then it's all your fault and if your a women then it's your husbands fault. Some will love it and others hate it.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 12-18-21

Resonated with me but not sure what to do next

In every chapter of this book something resonated with me. It exposed and put into words unhelpful thought patterns I didn’t even realise I had but definitely do. My only criticism is that I feel like I don’t know what to do next - I feel like this book has pointed to the problem but not had enough focus on the answer and on hope for change! It’s more an exposing of the damage - which is important! But I have to say I have ended this book feeling discouraged. My damage is exposed but little is written on how to overcome it which has left me feeling unsettled. So much of the focus is on the mistakes of men and evangelical literature - and I don’t deny that there is a lot of truth behind it. But as the woman - I feel left with the sense that there is nothing I can do to change it - it’s up to my husband and powers that be to do the changing. So I don’t feel it has empowered me but rather made me feel like a victim. Where is the grace and hope for me? Do I really have to wait for others to repent before I can feel at peace in this area? Perhaps this is something I need to seek out for myself because I do know that God is in the business of hope and restoring x

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  • Elizah
  • 08-09-21

EMPOWERING FIRST MARRIAGE AND SEX BOOK!

LOVED THIS BOOK 100%! What an amazing study and the findings are so powerful for women and men in evangelical churches. So helpful to not only understand how sex messages have been distorted but also powerful assertions about how to fix them! Made me feel confident to find resources and tackle sexual issues head-on!

1 person found this helpful