• When Loving Him Is Hurting You

  • Hope and Help for Women Dealing with Narcissism and Emotional Abuse
  • By: Dr. David Hawkins
  • Narrated by: Jim Denison
  • Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
  • 4.8 out of 5 stars (714 ratings)

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When Loving Him Is Hurting You

By: Dr. David Hawkins
Narrated by: Jim Denison
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Publisher's Summary

It's okay to have needs of your own

You fell in love with him. But over time you've come to realize he's in love with himself - and you feel trapped. His needs, his problems, and his plans always seem to take precedence over yours. Dr. David Hawkins, director of the Marriage Recovery Center, offers a guide to help you identify signs of narcissism, understand how your loved one's issues are affecting you, and prepare a biblical game plan for freeing yourself to live courageously in light of God's love.

Whether the man in your life can be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), exhibits narcissistic traits and emotionally abusive behavior, or has arrogant and self-centered tendencies, the emotional pain he causes you is very real. Discover the truths, wisdom, and grace you need to spark change in your relationship, set boundaries, and experience healing.

©2017 eChristian (P)2017 eChristian

What listeners say about When Loving Him Is Hurting You

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The book I so desperately needed to read

I’m a Christian woman married to a “believing” man with lots of narcissistic traits. I’ve struggled to decide what next moves to make to keep myself and my children on a healthy path. I’ve been convicted about how I’ve been dealing with things as well. I wanted biblical perspective... and I got it here. I’ve read countless articles and books on the topic. But none have been as helpful, for me anyway. I highly recommend this to anyone struggling with narcissism in their relationships. It’s been eye opening to say the least. I have more clarity and a better take on what changes I need to make.

30 people found this helpful

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Life changing

Wow. No one can possibly understand what one goes through. To find a book that explains my life story, while equipping me to make changes in my own life that will forever change the course of my destiny and my children’s. Giving me my life back. I am getting stronger every single day! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

27 people found this helpful

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Thank You

This Doctor helped me see things that I have been dealing with for 30 years, and now I am more certain about the cause of my severe depression and anxiety, not to mention other health issues. I was put in a mental hospital 4 years ago because of my husbands narcissistic behavior and have been suffering from depression ever since. I have been on one medication after another and nothing really helps. I feel like the life has been sucked out of me. I am going to therapy, but no one has ever really explained things to me the way Dr. Hawkins does in this book. Thank you. Now I am struggling with anxiety while trying to come up with a way to get out of this dangerous situation I am stuck in!

15 people found this helpful

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A must read!

if you are in an emotionally abusive relationship or living with a narcissist this book is a 100% must read book. It helps you realize everything you are experiencing and helps you see that it's not you and it truly is the other person causing the crazy making. It helps you identify warning signs it helps you indicate signs to see if the person is really changing and it helps you to search out a path to find yourself again. I couldn't wait to get into my vehicle and listen to the book each time! the timing of finding this book in my life was perfect in that it helped me make a critical decision to live my life and to let go of the person who is unwilling to change their behavior. I can't recommend this book more highly if you are in a relationship with a narcissist and an emotional verbal abuser.

14 people found this helpful

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it started good

I have nothing against the Bible or religion. but I was looking for a book to help me without quoting scripture and it didn't seem like it was that kind of book from the sample that I listened to.

8 people found this helpful

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Very well written! Educational!

Realized things about myself as well as my partner. Everyone has flaws. Together we are making changes for the sake of our marriage and family. Thank you Dr for the help.

8 people found this helpful

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Outstanding perspective!

This book is a perfect match in every way to my experiences and I am shocked at how someone who hasn't experienced it first hand can portray such detailed truths in this writing. Been looking for a two sided approach to the solutions and this was it. Wonderful!!

7 people found this helpful

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I Sooo Needed this book!

Looooved it and will listen to it over and over. Insightful, and I feel EMPOWERED!

5 people found this helpful

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loved it

explained in a way that really radiated with me and gave me even more biblical profound insight to some issues I'm dealing with concerning my spouse and also myself. we are both accountable for our actions and reactions! I'm listening again.

4 people found this helpful

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Too Confusing

This is too scattered a d difficult to understand. If I could exchange it I would.

3 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 08-20-22

Fantastic listen!

This book is an eye opener for Narcissistic & emotional abuse, it is a must listen if you are in a Narcissistic relationship or would like to understand it more…..it has helped me more than I could have imagined.

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  • l
  • 08-29-18

Wonderful

fantastically useful. good faith sense thankyou. very positive to hear this understanding from a man

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  • Anonymous User
  • 03-18-18

Thank you

Very helpful to gain clarity and take steps towards a healthy change.

I have listened to this more than once. 🙂

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  • Anonymous User
  • 04-02-21

A must read

This book is one of the most important books I have read. It’s insights into behaviours and the profoundly damaging effects that another person can inflict on someone who internalises it all over time is both refreshing, enlightening, and almost most importantly such a massive relief that there is someone out there that actually understands the additional damage and feeling of helplessness caused by a lack of understanding by support networks and professionals when help is sought. This is a profoundly important piece of work. To Dr Hawkins... my most sincere and grateful thanks from not just myself, but from so many others who I know will find comfort and healing from it.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 04-19-21

Excellent advice for living with a narcissistic pe

This was so enlightening. It helped me recognise the man I was living with and the personality traits which had confused and threatened me for 5 years. I am addressing this and standing up for myself thanks to this understanding. I am finding a way to express the impact his behaviour has had on me and am hopeful that he might understand which will allow us to resolve this over time. Really worth listening to.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Angie Tuck
  • 10-29-22

Worst book ever

So boring & dumb , don’t bother .. I’d rather staple my eyelids shut than listen to this , it would be less painful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 09-24-22

Applicable to everyone

I was apprehensive because of the gendered title. However after listening to the whole book and not letting the bias deter me, I feel I’ve gained a lot of insight into what it means to have a healthy, happy and full outlook on relationships and setting boundaries. Even though I wouldn’t consider myself Christian either the scripture references really resonated with me still. All in all a great book to read if you are a NPD sufferer or are dating someone who is NPD.

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  • Rebecca M.
  • 03-15-22

To much preaching

look, I'm ok with Christian references now and then but you should have a disclaimer on purchasing if it is going to have as many as this book does. I stopped listening chapter one and deleted from my device. far too many Bible references for me 🤦‍♀️

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  • Cara
  • 03-06-22

Great book about narcissistic and emotional abuse

If you’re looking for a book that provides biblically advice as well as what to do when you’re in emotionally abusive relationship. This is the book for you.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 01-17-22

Bible references

Too many biblical references for my liking. I am Not Christian. Should be disclosed upon purchasing

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  • Anonymous User
  • 08-19-21

When loving him is hurting you

Good for any woman in a abusive relationship, not sure why it's only for women. I usually don't take well to religious references but I am spiritual & found the references to Christianity & Church practical & accurate, criticising the abuse that happens in the name of religion. I recommend this.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 02-08-19

life changing..heart feeling ..life saver..

this book changed my life
no words to describe the tools it gave me
better than years of on and off counseling..this book knows what other clinicians dont