• When Your Daughter Has BPD

  • Essential Skills to Help Families Manage Borderline Personality Disorder
  • By: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
  • Narrated by: Terrence Bayes
  • Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (76 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

If you have a daughter with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you may feel frustration, shame, and your family may be at the breaking point dealing with angry outbursts, threats, and constant emergencies. You may even feel guilty for not enjoying spending time with your child - but how can you when her behavior is abusive toward you and the rest of your family? You need solid skills you can use now to help your daughter and hold your family together.

In this important guide, you'll learn real solutions and strategies based in proven-effective DBT and CBT to help you weather the storm of BPD and restore a sense of normalcy and balance in your life. You'll find an overview of BPD so you can better understand the driving forces behind your daughter's difficult behavior. You'll discover how you can help your daughter get the help she needs while also setting boundaries that foster respect and self-care for you and others in your family. And, most importantly, you'll learn "emergency parenting techniques" to help you put a stop to abusive patterns and restore peace.

If your daughter has BPD and your family is struggling to make it through each day, this book offers essential skills to help you cope and recover a sense of stability.

©2017 Daniel S. Lobel (P)2020 Tantor

What listeners say about When Your Daughter Has BPD

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Most helpful book on the subject yet

I think the doctor interviewed my daughter for this book. I am joking but it sounds exactly like my daughter...Extremely helpful. Provides coping strategies for the parents of BPD daughters. My daughter is a grown woman but this was still very helpful in explaining her behavior.

We/she has seen numerous therapists over many years. This was the most enlightened info have gotten to date. Highly recommend

9 people found this helpful

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Amazing and thorough

This book saved my 12 year olds life and our family. We caught her BPD early and in just a few months she behaves like a normal child. No more explosions, violence or severe anxiety. No more perseveration. You must work together with your spouse and follow the book exactly. You must understand extinction bursts and be prepared for it. It often seems like the behavior just got exponentially worse. You must push through and hold steady. It was shocking when it happened. The most terrible outrageous behavior ever seen. Recommend wholeheartedly

6 people found this helpful

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Do not get this audiobook

The narrator’s voice is basically intolerable. Tone, cadence, phrasing- ugh. Just don’t get this audiobook. This is the types of text that needs to be read with warmth and a sense of empathy. This sounds like a snarky robot is reading it.

2 people found this helpful

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Sure would have been nice to have had this…

…35 years ago…

But I’m not sure all of the suggestions would have worked, as I tried them constantly.

1 person found this helpful

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Good look into this disorder

The narration was boring and sometimes there was no separation from one part to the next. The information in this book is very helpful and gives me a feeling of hopefulness and manageability. I think this book is a good resource and I recommend this book.

1 person found this helpful

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Great resource for parenting all teens!

I've begun to suspect one of mine has BPD. She's too young to be diagnosed, but this book helped me practically. It reinforced that most of us ARE good parents, don't let the difficult child define you. It tells typical behaviors that BPD's have and how to face them. It's right on as far as describing my experiences. It's good to know we are not alone, and there is help. I believe kids can heal this- or prevent it from coming to fruition, with the right tools. We need more therapists to acknowledge the specific problems without diagnosing, and to give parents the tools and advice that is fitting. I wish I had this tool years and years ago. If you're a parent, read it.

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Extremely helpful and actionable

The author described my family’s dynamics. Extremely insightful and very clear and actionable suggestions for navigating this life-long condition. Thank you. I wish I would have had this book when my daughter was a young teenager - or even younger. Looking back, I can see that as a young child she already was displaying many BPD traits. Thank you.

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Very useful information

Very helpful information to effectively interface with your daughter who has (or, is suspected to have) Borderline Personality Disorder.

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This book saved my family

This a no nonsense guide to living with a child with BPD.

When we first listened, we thought the book was written directly for my specific family. Every single situation applied to us.

It helped us see beyond the hate and anger and made it easy for us to distinguish the horrible disease from the girl we loved.

A game changer.

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When your daughter has BPD

This is a great resource to have when understanding BPD and how the family unit can cope with the disorder. It’s easy to read and the strategies are easy to use. I highly recommend this book.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 02-17-22

When your daughter has BOD

Thanks to all for this book, I have been searching for years, to find the awnsers
In this amazing book, I’ve shared it with my mum, who I know will also Benifit from the in depth knowledge covered so well, the problem and the solution!
Bless you, a very grateful mother with BPD, and young teenager that may also have it. You have given me so many tools, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, ericka

1 person found this helpful

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  • Sandie
  • 05-26-21

Presents only one version of BPD

My daughter has BPD, which is why I bought this book. I didn't recognise my daughter in this book. Nor did I recognise my sister, and a close friend, who also have BPD. This book presumes that BPD necessarily involves some very unpleasant behaviours. Listening to this book, it would be hard to imagine that a person with BPD could be someone you'd like to be around, but in my experience, the person who is most harmed by the BPD is the sufferer themselves. My daughter, for example, is disorganised, gets upset easily and finds it hard to calm down, but she is a perfectly lovely person with many friends. My sister has extreme emotional responses, but it's unlikely that anyone would notice them beyond her immediate family. All three of the people I know with BPD suffered some form of trauma as a young person, which, as I understand it, is fairly common, but there is little acknowledgement of this in the book. I have no doubt that Dr Lobel knows more about BPD than I do, but I wonder if the understanding of the disorder has expanded since this book was published.

2 people found this helpful

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  • Geoff Anderson
  • 09-06-20

Solid tips for parents of BPD

Some useful insights into the spiralling problem of BPD and the role we as parents have and what we can do to help.

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