• Wired for Love

  • How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship
  • By: Stan Tatkin PsyD MFT
  • Narrated by: Michael Hinton
  • Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (1,034 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

"What the heck is my partner thinking?" is a common refrain in romantic relationships and with good reason. Every person is wired for love differently, with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and rituals, making it possible to actually neurologically prime the brain for greater love and fewer conflicts.

Wired for Love is an innovative guide to understanding your partner's brain and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust. Synthesizing research findings drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this audiobook presents 10 guiding principles that can improve any relationship.

©2011 Stan Tatkin (P)2015 Tantor

Critic Reviews

"A marvelous resource." (Rick Hanson, PhD, author of Buddha's Brain)

What listeners say about Wired for Love

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Excellent book and based on science

What did you love best about Wired for Love?

Loved this book, plan to listen to it again. I love how the author incorporates major attachment theorists as well as recent research on interpersonal neurobiology. Is written in a way that people not in the psychology field can understand the concepts. The book also has a really great narrator. Have recommended the book to patients.

12 people found this helpful

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This book saved my relationship

If you always thought that the 'men are from Mars and women are from Venus" books were hokie and based on a lot of subjective opinions then this is the book for you! based on a lot of research and science of the brain the author very clearly and in layman's terms lays out how the brain is literally wired for love and why we do the things we do in relationships.

9 people found this helpful

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No PDF = 1 star

Any audio book that has exercises but the production team cannot be bothered to create and add a PDF of those exercises for listeners, is to me, and in my opinion should be to you, a one star showing. In fact you’ve already written it and printed it. Greedy and not showing up for the people.who paid you for your work. That aside this would have been a 4 or 5 star review.

47 people found this helpful

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Review: Wired for Love

Finally, a book on making relationships work that is based on science and not standard marriage counseling BS.

7 people found this helpful

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For the next one...

This book was amazing and very painful, in a good way. I feel better armed for love in the future, I understand better what frustrated me in my former marriage and also where I failed as a husband.

This is really a must read. It won’t just affect romantic relationships: it’ll make you a better parent, boss, employee, friend, sibling, etc.

4 people found this helpful

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Good narration horrible scientific term pronunciation

Sits a gold boom that has a lot of useful info. However, the narrator (and the recording crew) had no clue how to pronounce scientific terms. It was SO BAD as to completely distract from the points being made/info being conveyed.
Re-record those sections where brain science is discussed.

4 people found this helpful

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Game changer

If you really want lasting, positive results, listen and follow the instructions herein. I've listened to this book more times than any other. It's a great companion and ally for my ambassadors.

4 people found this helpful

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well worth the time

this book cut through the fluff and provided direct advice on how to approach and how to improve relationships.
the suggestions were logical and can be used on both romantic and non romantic relationships.

4 people found this helpful

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Mostly boring and difficult to listen to.

I definitely struggled to finish this. The narrator was not very good, plus a lot of the content of the book was extremely boring with a lot of history and scientific based chapters. I skipped over a good portion of this book trying to get to the helpful stuff. There is some helpful stuff, but I really wouldn't recommend this book.

3 people found this helpful

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great perspective

This is a great book with a fresh and enlightening perspective on relationship issues and remedies.

3 people found this helpful

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  • Ann
  • 05-20-18

Attached is better

I was really looking forward to this book as I'd heard so many rave reviews. However I found the heavy use of jargon un-necessary and the dialogues/examples banal and cheesy. If you are interested in the subject of attachment theory I would recommend Attached over this book.

6 people found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 06-10-22

Important information but not pleasurable to listen through

This book felt like homework and was so incredibly dull. Which is weird for me, because personal growth, and particularly relationship work and growth is a core value for me. This book felt elementary, good for some totally new to this work. The examples provided of some arguments between couples sometimes provided some insights, but mostly just highlighted how toxic some people are with each other, and reminded me about how I used to be years ago.

I’m looking for deeper work in this field, this wasn’t it but I got myself to sit through every long hour of it.

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  • Alice T.
  • 11-08-21

Best couples support book we’ve read

My partner and I become aware of our attachment styles and began researching attachment styles and how to navigate each other’s seemingly opposing needs. We read attached which wasn’t bad, but when my partner found this one we both really connected to it more and the way in which it talks about connecting and gives exercises to try to help create our “couple bubble”. We really liked this book and got a lot from it.

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  • Amzons Customer
  • 04-29-20

The best so far

Hoping to put it into practice, if my marriage doesn't improve it's because I did not do as I was told. Explained everything clearly and gave good case studies.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 09-01-21

good learning rool

I loved it, very interesting read couldn't stop listening to it. recommend reading this book to anyone having attachmemt questions.

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  • Kindle Customer
  • 06-30-21

Simply superb!

Absolutely fabulous! The knowledge presented in this book changed my life.
This is a must read!

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  • Kim Thomas
  • 05-19-21

Be an expert in your love bubble!

This is incredible informative to go into or be in relationship with. Committing to bringing each other home.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 12-16-19

Amazing

No words can explain how impactful this book is I have shared it 10 times and will continue to do so!

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  • Angus Lawrence
  • 06-07-18

Crap narrator - can't listen

This may as well have been narrated by a computer program. Seeking a refund from audible.

1 person found this helpful